Do you like coffee?
I like coffee. I didn’t always like coffee. I was told that when I was a small child, if I drank coffee, it would stunt my growth and I would end up height challenged, far beneath my peers.
Of course, I was already one of the shortest among my classmates, so I figured it wouldn’t hurt anything, and so I began to often find myself staring into that brown abyss of warm flavor and caffeine.
Turns out, the joke was on them. Because now I’m the tallest in my family. In history. (At least, I’m fairly certain: there are some branches of the family tree that remain dark and mysterious to me. But until they come forward and prove that they’re taller than me, I’m going to claim it.)
In my other work (or what you might call my “day job”, in that it takes place during the day), coffee is a necessary stimulant:Â shifts of twelve hours and longer are not uncommon but rather are the norm, and thus the ingestion of said liquid refreshment is vital to my general productivity and well-being.
That being said, we tend to have a very specific machine for brewing said coffee. We do not, like our heroes here, have an inhabitant who possesses the ability to create such things as a by-product of some foreign process.
I am not entirely certain I would drink what our friend is planning on serving.
But on the other hand, it is morning…
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